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chugga1time Application EDIT 4
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chugga1time Application EDIT 4
07-22-2012, 01:28,
Post: #11
Saera Offline
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Saera 		Obsidian Posts: 940
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RE: chugga1time Application EDIT 3
Your story just seems really random, the run on sentences doesn't seem to help either.
If you read some of the accepted applications, even fairly short ones can be very meaningful. The objective isn't exactly the length of your story, but the content of it, think if the readers would enjoy reading it like a story.
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07-23-2012, 18:16,
Post: #12
chugga1time Offline
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RE: chugga1time Application EDIT 3
Thanks I will do a rewrite it should be better
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07-23-2012, 21:25,
Post: #13
chugga1time Offline
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RE: chugga1time Application EDIT 4
It has been redone completely Saera hope you like this one more Smiley
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07-24-2012, 00:38,
Post: #14
Saera Offline
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RE: chugga1time Application EDIT 4
Welcome to Kiwike.
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